Sack your Dad for Father's Day

If I was a big pop mogul like Simon Cowell, well firstly I'd dye my skin orange and sport a flat top hair-cut, but then I'd also sack all Dads from bands. This might not seem like the kind of advice you'd need to employ too often but in the case of the Mystery Jets it seems to have worked wonders. Regarde...

With Dad:



Crusty. Without Dad:



Smooth. Their new single, 'Two Doors Down', is stupendous. The video is pure eighties camp. It's fun people, music can be fun! Dad's need not apply.

Newzzzzzzzzzzzz

Faded pop star/ Former King Of Pop/ War criminal (delete as appropriate) Michael Jackson allegedly pulled out of a guest appearance on American Idol at the last minute (Yahoo Music)

Amy Winehouse will play Nelson Mandela's 90th birthday party in Hyde Park. Unfortunately, Queen and Annie Lennox will also be there. Hasn't he suffered enough? (NME)

The youngest Hanson brother has impregnated a female, luckily it was his wife. Look how he's grown. The child is the FIFTH Hanson offspring...that's enough for a new band (People)

What happens when you write and record a song and someone else covers it and then they block it from being shown citing 'copyright laws'? Who cares? Er, Radiohead do actually. Perhaps Prince is a little embarrassed by his cover of 'Creep'? (Billboard)

Video of The Day

I love Weezer. There, I've said it. Pinkerton is one of my favourite albums of all time so for me a new Weezer album is something to get mildly excited about. Their last one was pretty crap, but it's already looking good for their soon to be released sixth album, the third to be self-titled. Here's a picture (please note Rivers Cuomo's look, I think it's called 'gay country singer'):



The first single from the album is called 'Pork And Beans' and was written in response to the band's record company wanting them to record some hit singles, hence the Timbaland name-check. They've made a pretty amazing video for it too, one that features a host of youtube 'stars' such as the guy who gave us 'Chocolate Rain' and that hysterical (as in overly emotional) Britney-loving guy (is it a guy? It might not be...). Anyways, the video is great and the song is typical Weezer, i.e. not very innovative but somehow much greater then the sum of its parts. Rock on Garth!

Gobbledigook?

Sigur Ros have released details of their forthcoming album which will be out on 24 June via XL (I know, ANOTHER band have signed with them!). The album is called...erm...this might not be right, "Með suð í eyrum við spilum endalaust", which I'm reliably told translates as "thank you to the BBC for making us a shit load of cash by using our song over and over again". No, it doesn't really, it means "With a buzz in our ears we play endlessly". In keeping with XL's fondness for letting their artists experiment with release dates and formats you can download the first song 'Gobbledigook' from here

Not sure if this is the first single, or merely a teaser but it's a slight change in style, more acoustic and less overly epic then their previous stuff. I'm still waiting for their oft-delayed gabba album, but maybe that's just me...

All White

The Mighty Boosh are holding their very first festival in Kent this summer and one of the acts that have just been added to the bill are American three-piece, White Denim. Having read about them in magazines with my eyes I decided to listen to them on the internet with my ears. It was an enjoyable experience, not least because you get the added bonus of a rather brilliant video. The song is called 'Let's Talk About It' and it starts off as ragged garage stomp- I know I thought of The Hives too- and then it slowly mutates into one extended prog coda that goes for about two minutes. There's an album coming out in July so by then we should be able to tell if they're more then just another retro(gressive) guitar band, but so far the signs are good.

Je ne c'est pas, pouquoi?

Being a fairly sad individual meant that I spent Saturday night watching the shit-fest that is Eurovision. More and more irrelevent as the years go by, it still throws up some wonderfully appalling performances and spectacles not seen this side of gay pride. This year we had Andy 'don't refer to me as a singing bin man' Abrahams who pre-empted his imminent last place finish with a wonderful speech about how his song was 'too good' to win Eurovision...ahem. One performance included four singing brides- one of which was at least 65 years old- a washing line, a woman with apples on her dress and a singer who actually looked pretty amazing; thank you Bosnia for this feast for the eyes (perhaps not the ears). My personal favourite however came in the shape of France's lithsome sex pest, Sebastien Tellier whose entry was so good that it stuck out like the proverbial sore thumb, if said thumb was rising out of a river of shit. Please watch this carefully, the highlights come thick and fast. The golf cart, the bearded ladies, the lack of socks, the helium, the general bemusement of the crowd, etc. Tellier eventually scored just over 40 points, about 200 points less then the winner, but who cares right? It's all rigged anyway. But for one night Tellier showed Europe who's boss when it comes to camp disco.

Johnny Be Good

I recently saw Laura Marling at the Union Chapel in London and supporting her was a fellow named Johnny Flynn. Blonde of hair and ruddy of cheek, Flynn was surprisingly shy considering he's also a budding actor and all round 'hottie' (so says just about everyone on his youtube page). He has an album out on Monday called A Larum (I have no idea either), and if the couple of songs on t'internet are anything to go then it should definitely be worth a listen. The support slot with Marling was no accident, they both share a love for literate, spooky folk that flits between elegant and almost rollicking.

Below is the video for 'Tickle Me Pink'. I particularly like the fact that the original idea for the video was clearly to just have the puppet roaming the recesses of Flynn's mind until the record company decided we needed more shots of him in the flesh so now we have a slightly disingenuous 'party scene' with some of his mates dancing around in hoodies to the sound of fiddles and steel guitar.



EDIT: I have just read that Johnny Flynn is the half-brother of none other then musical maverick Jerome Flynn, as in Robson & Jerome. Music runs in the family clearly, i.e. the mother's side in this case.

N.E.W V.I.D.E.O F.R.O.M N.E.R.D

The Neptunes off-shot N.E.R.D return with their third album Seeing Sounds (see image above) in the next few weeks. There have been rumours of a bit of ruck within The Neptunes, with Chad Hugo missing from their recent productions. In his absence Pharrell has veered from his disappointing work on Gwen Stefani and Beyonce's latest efforts to some stellar productions for Madonna on Hard Candy (his tracks are roughly twenty times better then Timbaland's). Meanwhile, Chad has been off trying desperately to make Ashlee Simpson a pop star and that clearly hasn't worked, hence the fact that the duo finally seem reconciled.

Below is the first single from Seeing Sounds, called 'Everyone Nose (All The Girls Standing In The Line For The Bathroom)', and it's a barely veiled attack on female groupies and their drug habits (ahhh, so that's what the title means, it all makes sense now). The video looks like something Terry Richardson might have knocked up, all grimy images of beautiful people with lots of sweating and nakedness. There's also a blink and you'll miss it cameo by Lindsey Lohan lending her superior acting talents to a role that sees her trying to enter a club while looking slightly intoxicated. How she coped I'll never know. The song itself is insanely catchy, full of vocal effects and a jazzy bassline that mixes with some typically frenetic percussion. Unfortunately, there's a rather dull mid-section where Pharrell releases his 'unique' falsetto over some lame piano motifs. Still, it's about a million times better then anything from Fly Or Die.

Flippin' Beck

You may have noticed a slight obsession forming around a certain Mr Beck Hansen. It is true, I would probably proclaim him burping the alphabet as the greatest thing ever recorded, but there we are. I received the following email today, telling me all kinds of wondrous things, please avert your eyes downwards:

BECK PREMIERES NEW TRACK ON ZANE LOWE'S BBC RADIO 1 SHOW
'CHEMTRAILS' NOW STREAMING AT BECK.COM AND BECK'S OFFICIAL MYSPACE PAGE

The world got a first taste of Beck's as yet untitled new album today, as Zane Lowe's BBC Radio 1 show premiered the song 'Chemtrails' and declared it today's "hottest record in the world." The song is now streaming at Beck.com (http://www.beck.com/) and Beck's MySpace page (http://www.myspace.com/beck).

While not a single, "Chemtrails" is a genre-bending tour de force that showcases Beck and producer Danger Mouse's shared affection for late '60s psych-pop as Beck takes his songwriting and performing skills in yet another bold, unforeseen and as always captivating new direction.

The album is slated for an early summer release. More info will be available soon, including the record's title, release date and upcoming singles

Ignore the bit about Zane Lowe and instead head straight to Beck's website or myspace page to hear 'Chemtrails', which as you can see is definitely NOT the new single. Having heard it it's obvious why, not that it isn't great, but it's too fiddly, there are too many stops and starts and no chorus, except Beck repeating the slightly stoned, "there are too many people". Still, Danger Mouse's Midas touch is evident and it all makes me very excited for the forthcoming album...roll on the summer!

A very serious message

Coldplay are deadly serious. Not only are they all very talented musicians, but they also care terribly about the state of our planet. Add to this smorgasbord of seriousness a full blown desire to educate the illiterate masses through song and through imagery. In order to do this most effectively they've asked EMI if they can make two videos for their new single, the Tears For Fears-esque 'Violet Hill'. The single is taken from their forthcoming album 'Viva La Vida or Death And All His Friends'. No, that isn't me being indecisive, that really is the full title of the album, and what a pretentious mouthful it is. But remember, we're here to be educated so please pay attention.

This is the alternate video. It's very political.



It's actually quite funny. Relatively speaking.

This official one however, is really very serious and they'd appreciate it if you stopped giggling at their silly costumes, they're very lucky to have been given access to the ITV wardrobe, and no Sharpe doesn't want his clothes back. I'm sure it's all meant to mean something, but really all I get from it is lots of facial hair, some hill climbing and Chris Martin finding it hard to walk through the snow. I've never been able to get metaphor and allegory, so perhaps the bigger themes are lost on me. But, I suspect that some where out there Bono is cursing the fact that he didn't think of it sooner.

Cover Uncovered

Hip hop is not known for it's restraint, or for it's subtlety, and to that I say 'Thank the Lord', because it gives us images such as the one shown above, for this is the cover of rapper Lil Wayne's soon to be released sixth studio album. Have you ever seen a better front cover in all your life? Hell, have you ever seen a better image in all your life? In case your too in awe to fully grasp what's going on, let me break it down for you into its constituent parts; essentially, there's a small child in a dapper blue, pin-striped suit staring just off camera. He looks a little startled. He's probably been chairing a meeting in his huge office or brokering some big deal with some heavyweight big-timers. It's kind of like those toilet paper adverts where the toddler is the company director and he gets to order people about while filling his nappy, only in this case, rather then being based in a factory in Reading or Slough, our kid is living it up in New York, renting out a top floor apartment and entertaining some female toddlers with glasses of chocolate milk and Oreo cookies. This kid is the don, just check out the ring on his little finger, the guy (I mean kid) means business. If you don't believe me, then draw your attention to the rather fetching (if not slightly disturbing) tattoos, specifically the tears that appear just beneath his eyes. Now, I'm no expert but I've seen The Wire and Oz enough times to know that those tears are meant to represent how many people you've murdered. Last time I checked Fisher Price had yet to release their range of AK-47s but I guess it's only a matter of time. Hip Hop may have been accused of glorifying violence, but with this image it's out to break the final taboo; even your two year old will gun you down if you forget the Cheerios.

He's a big lad, he's a bonnie lad

Every Bonnie "Prince" Billy release should be welcomed from the roof tops, and so it is with the release of his 100th album, 'Lie Down In The Light'. As the title suggests, the album finds Will Oldham (for it is he) in a 'bonnie' mood, most songs peppered with lilting harmonies and the odd sprinkling of slide guitar. If I had a wooden porch I'd take a rocking chair out onto it, put this album on and and tap my foot while rocking back and forth. There are of course a few ventures into the dark territory but it wouldn't be a Bonnie "Prince" Billy album if there weren't some shadows lurking around.

Here's the front cover. I like the drawing, it reminds me of He-Man for some reason.

Introducing...

The Shortwave Set. Like I'm the first one to have ever heard of them, like it's an EXCLUSIVE or something, like I was sent their album by the record company who practically begged me to listen to it and review it. Like hell I was.



The song's called 'No Social' and it's from their brand spanking new second album Replica Sun Machine, which incidently was produced by none other then Danger Mouse. Mr Mouse had apparently been mouthing off about their debut album to anyone who'd listen and he loved it so much he called them up and was all like "Hey, erm, I like totally want to work on your next record". Or something. The video's got lots of paint in it and the song features the great line, "everyone knows that a dog dressed in clothes is still a dog".

Tesco Value

You know when you're in a supermarket and they don't have the exact product you need, you tend to go for the cheapest alternative don't you? Sometimes the good ones aren't available so you just settle for the next best thing. Hopefully, it will be cheaper so at least you can feel a bit better when it doesn't taste as good and everyone judges you badly for buying it in the first place.

The makers of the new James Bond film must know what that's like because it's been announced (well, when I say it's been announced what I really mean is that I saw it in a newspaper over someone's shoulder at the train station this evening) that instead of Amy Winehouse doing the new Bond theme, the coveted accolade will go to either Adele or Duffy. Apparently, the two erstwhile singers will 'battle it out' for the chance to sing the theme to Quantam of Solace (good luck getting something to rhyme with THAT!). How this fight will play out is anyone's guess, but I can just imagine the two of them sweating buckets over a tense game of Guess Who.

Here's a clip of Amy Winehouse from the Mercury Awards, for the simple reason that it's amazing:

Look what's 'Going On'

Gnarls Barkley have scrapped the release of mooted second single 'Who's Gonna Save My Soul', in favour of 'Going On'. Someone at their record company obviously felt the former was slightly too depressing for these sunny times, and though the latter is still fairly depressing in terms of the lyrical content (musing on death seems to be Cee-Lo's raison d'etre), it does at least wear a wonky smile. Musically speaking.

The video is nice. For one thing they've got rid of all those flashing lights from the 'Run' video, the ones that were causing epileptic fits, but they haven't forgotten the dancing. I love a bit of choreography I do. Also, the magic door at the end, how good would that be? A quick exit has never been simpler or more effective. Be quite nice to be able to come back though wouldn't it? Still, it is only a video I suppose.

They've gone lost their minds...

BUY THIS:



BAN THIS:



This album is currently number 1 in the UK album charts. It knocked Madonna off the number 1 spot. It only made number 14 in Germany, so theoretically that makes us 14 times more accountable for Scooter's existence. We should ALL be ashamed...

Celine Tiles

I've always thought, like many of you perhaps, that Celine Dion is fucking crazy. It may not come across in her songs - although 'My Heart Will Go On' does sound like it's been touched by the Devil - but it's all there in her mannerisms and the way she performs. First, there's the uncomfortable way she stands when she sings, her legs apart in a weirdly masculine manner, like she's about to scratch her balls and maybe spit out some chewing gum. Then there's the accent, a strange hybrid of French classicism and annoying American twang that sounds like nothing else. The pinnacle of her mania can be summed up by her unnerving facial tics, not only when she sings but also when she speaks. She seems to be grunting or gurning constantly, like she's having a fit or passing wind. All of the best bits about Celine (I feel we're on first name terms) are shown in the video below, a kind of commercial for the Eurovision song contest. Marvel at the way every sentence ends with a nodd of the head, laugh at the way she says "very fortunate" and finally piss you pants at the way it segues into her singing her Eurovision winning song. Look at her eyes people, the woman is posessed!!! Altogether now, "she's just a Devil woman, with evil in her eyes"

XL-ent (oh Lordy...)

Beck has just inked a deal with independent label, XL, to release his as yet untitled new album in the UK this summer. Having previously released his efforts through major labels like Geffen and Interscope, it seems the lure of the independent - and specifically an independent label so willing to innovate - was too great for Beck. It's no surprise that it's already been announced that the album will be out in less then six weeks, a move mirroring that of The Raconteurs (also signed to XL) who released second album 'The Consolers Of The Lonely' within two weeks of announcing it even existed. For some artists the process of having to wait four months between the album being completed and people actually getting to hear it is long gone.

XL must still be on cloud nine following the signing of Radiohead for their recent album 'In Rainbows'. Although they weren't directly responsible for the radical way in which it was released (I'm not going to repeat it here, you know all about it by now), they did in theory sign a band whose new album was probably already in the homes of everyone (and more) that wanted to own it. It wasn't exactly a risk, but it was an interesting move seeing as the packaging of the physical album probably wasn't cheap and the subsequent single releases haven't exactly brought in the cash. What it does show is that XL are now building up an amazing roster of acts, a roster that already includes Cajun Dance Party, M.I.A, Dizzee Rascal, Vampire Weekend, Devendra Banhart, The White Stripes and many others.

Let us not forget also, that it was XL that brought us the classic 'On A Ragga Tip' by SL2. Break out your smiley face T-shirt and get down to some proper dance music (ahem).

Cry Me A River

I'm not going to show off, but I can cry out of one eye. Constantly. It's a talent I acquired at circus school when I was younger, before all the hullabaloo about poor working conditions and charges of exploitation. Anyway, it seems that some pop stars out there can cry on demand too, and they all seem to be doing it while a camera points in their direction.



First up is dear old Mariah Carey. The video for her new single 'Bye Bye' is an emotive piece of cinema verite, a distillation of what it's like to live the life of a mega-selling pop diva, but have real feelings too. Over plaintive keys and a subdued beat our heroine jots down some tender verse (or is a shopping list?) and wipes away a tear that starts to...hang on, you can't see a tear, there's no sign of moisture, for all we know she could be wiping a crusty bit of sleep from the corner of her eye. But no, the music and lyrics are there to anchor the meaning, she is crying she just cries very differently to how you or I do it. The best (or worst) bit of this video is the juxtaposition between the images, the way the clip of her crying marries up with the shot of her descending the steps of her private jet, or the way the words "I never knew I could hurt like this" play over a shot of her in a bikini. It's postmodern genius, a kind of diamond-encrusted self-help video.

Next up is everyone's favourite retro-soul-diva, Duffy! You love her, I love her, your mum loves her, what's not to love? Some may say she's souless, dull and completely disingenuous but what do they know? Go and listen to Adele you losers! Anywho, here Duffy is showing Mariah how it's done. No barely seen tears here, we're talking full on panda eyes, tears streaming down the cheeks and no mistake. I love the way she totally breaks down the 'fourth wall', the way she pleads with the director to stop filming because she's crying so damn much. But the evil director just tells her to shut it and keep singing (probably). It's just a shame that it's all so unconvincing...and boring...and very very serious. Give me Mariah in a perfectly lit room in a five star hotel being really upset any day of the week (except Tuesdays when I'm at pilates).

Nude As The News

Round up, round up, looky look...

Kurt Cobain's favourite band, The Vaselines, are reforming for a festival

More Beck album news here

Coldplay completely understand their demographic

Mariah Carey's only gone and got married...she's being quite cagey about the whole thing though

Some 'new' (i.e. rehashed) Oasis songs have been uploaded online. It's like taking photos of the stuff you throw out and then putting them in a photo album

Beck For Good...I'll be here all week

Check this

Five reasons to be excited:

1). IT'S BECK
2). It's produced by Danger Mouse who has already shown himself to be an incredibly versatile producer
3). It features Cat Power on vocals
4). It comes out in the next four to six weeks! No hanging around, no hearing crap versions on youtube because you're bored of waiting, no endless magazine interviews going on about how they've heard it and it's 'amazing' but you plebs will have to wait 2 more months
5). IT'S BECK

I'm officially quite excited. Expect more news about this album very soon (not that I know anything exclusive, just that I'll repeat it all here even though you can read it elsewhere. But it will keep you coming back, right? RIGHT?)

Going for Gold

Radio has gone a bit mental for 'L.E.S Artistes' by New York-based Santi White, aka Santogold. Such is her omnipresence that one of her other tracks, 'Creator', crops up on the new V05 advert, the one where the young soldiers line-up and they've all got cropped hair styles except the free-thinking, gel-soaked ones at the end.

Whilst trawling through youtube, as is my want, I landed upon another track from her forthcoming album (out May 12), called 'You'll Find A Way', a version of which is below.



Amazing I think you'll agree. Try dancing to that, I dare you. So, imagine my surprise to find out that the version that will appear on the album isn't the one above, but the one below. Unfortunately, it now sounds like a No Doubt album track...



EDIT: You can sleep easy dear readers, the album will in fact feature BOTH versions of 'You'll Find A Way'. Phew, that was a close one.

Album covers as art, part 1

We've come for your children.

Lost In Translation

We all loved Minnie Driver's first album, right? Come on, you heard it, we all did. No? OK, well here's another actress wheeling out some album full of lovesongs and old guff about pain and interior furnishings...oh, hang on, it's a Tom Waits covers album you say? Produced by David Sitek and featuring David Bowie? Sung by the heart stoppingly gorgeous Scarlett Johansson? OK, so I'm guessing the video's going to be hot in an atistic kind of way? It isn't? What do you mean? Oh, they've made one of those annoying videos that aims for art but falls down somewhere near GCSE photography, all close-ups of eyes and out of focus shots of skylines. There's just enough of Miss Johansson to make it worthwhile though, and the song's not nearly as bad as you'd have thought, even if Sitek seems to have just pressed the button marked 'atmospheric with a bit of Jesus And Mary Chain'. But keep watching it until about the third minute when there's a special guest appearance by none other then Salman Rushdie, who appears to be nibbling her ear. Make of that what you will.

You remember Ashanti, right?

She was big a few years ago, always had Ja Rule in the video. You remember Ja Rule. He was the original Akon, slightly gangsta but not really that scary. You want to know who is scary? Ashanti, that's who. Now either she's been watching one too many episodes of Damages or she's damn near lost her mind, because this video is odd. Basically, Ashanti has killed her boyfriend for cheating on her. Simple. The guy's lying face down in a bath of his own blood for God's sake. The highlights are too numerous to mention, but listen out for the serious acting chops at the beginning when she's calling the Police, she's really hurting. Or the way she takes a bath with all her clothes on and plunges into the water as some kind of rebirth or act of cleansing after the BRUTAL MURDER OF HER BOYFRIEND. The best bit is when she's shown in court at the end (I know, I've ruined it haven't I?) and they use a sketch of her like they do in British courts because they can't show the actual person. The problem is she's American and in America they practically use these court rooms as soap opera sets (remember OJ!?!) but it's a nice touch nonetheless. I only hope she gets out in time to make the follow-up video, in which we see her injecting heroin and mugging kids for money. Probably.

Underrated Album of the week

Ah, this feature is going to run and run, such is it's originality. We start with 'Hell Hath No Fury' by Clipse. Produced by The Neptunes this album was delayed and delayed by an idiotic record company who had arseholes where their ears should have been. When it was finally released no-one cared because they'd all fallen in love with Akon and Will.i.am thus proving that most people are idiots who shouldn't have been given ears in the first place. Highlights include the brilliantly titled 'Wamp Wamp (What It Do)' which seems to have been played on some of Pharrell's pots and pans, 'Trill' and the urgent 'Ain't Cha' featuring the mystifyingly brilliant lyric, "From France where the kids sing Frere Jacques". Oh yeah, Clipse be down with French nursery rhymes, they're all over that merde.

Lykke Li, Lykke lo

I love Swedish people. All of 'em. They look good, smell good, and they make great pop music. Even Ace Of Base...I mean EXCEPT Ace Of Base (honest). Here's the new single from Chan Marshall lookalike, Lykke Li (wow, that's a lot of 'l's and 'k's in that sentence), but it's not the brilliantly surreal promo video, oh no, it's a live recording featuring fellow Swedish pop phenomena Robyn, as well as members of The Concretes and Shout Out Louds. 'I'm Good, I'm Gone' is all stomping percussion, handclaps and a chorus so lovely I cried tears of milk.

Now hear this...Mike Skinner is a twat

Click on this here link: Yahoo Music

The Streets and war. Both of these things cause unquanitfiable harm to a huge number of people.

Album cover uncovered (a weekly feature).

Martha, Martha, Martha. This is the front of folk feline Martha Wainwright's second solo album, entitled (wait for it) 'I Know You're Married But I've Got Feelings Too'. Now I know what you're thinking, she's gone a bit Alanis Morissette with that title, it's a bit too wordy and pretensious and not nearly as funny as she thinks it is, but fear not as she's included a rather hilarious picture to go with it. Said picture will be housed within the transparent plastic casing that you get free with every CD purchase, or if you're being all technological, it will appear very small on your iPod screen. And what an image it is. You know when you were younger and it was hilarious to watch TV on your sofa upside down, for no real reason? It was wasn't it? Hilarious I mean. All the blood would rush to your head until your face turned a slightly unnerving puse colour. Well, here's Martha showing that even incredibly posh people can play that game too, although I would never dream of doing it with my shoes on. Heaven forbid, my Mum would have slapped me across the backs of my legs. Nor have I ever done it in a little black dress but that's another matter entirely. But this image is more sophisticated then that. You know how I know? Because it's in black and white. It's short-hand for class. This is also reinforced by the flowing font used for the name 'Martha Wainwright' which goes at the top next to that obviously tongue in cheek album title. She's being ironic you see. You probably don't get it. I'm glad it isn't in colour actually, because I have a feeling that the wallpaper doesn't match the carpet and there's a whiff of DFS about that sofa. Still, it does allow us to wonder about what it is she's watching upside down? My bet is it's Hollyoaks, Martha loves that shit.

The album's not as good as her first one by the way.

Walk This Way? Rather not...

Busta Rhymes, he of the turbo-charged rap, has teamed up with those nu-metal scamps Linkin Park to create one of those amazing, am-I-really-hearing-this-right musical collaborations. I'm sure you'll agree it's one of the most original and exciting examples of musical cross-pollination since Jay-Z teamed up with, erm, Linkin Park about, er, four years ago...