Surely, tonight of all nights is a good time to unveil another Beyoncé video, is it not? It's not like there's anything else going on is there? Plus, this is Beyoncé's fourteenth single to be released this month and as everyone knows, the fourteenth times a charm.
'Why Don't You Love Me?' didn't even make it onto the original pressings of I Am Sasha Fierce (an album that's been re-released more times than Blade Runner), but has been selected as the final single from this exhaustive campaign. The video introduces another character, B.B. Homemaker, and finds her doing all sorts of household chores dressed as Betty Page - vacuuming, washing the dishes, fixing her car - in between making what looks like a very difficult telephone conversation (perhaps Jay-Z had forgotten the Rice Crispies?). The best bit? When the B-dog (she'd like that moniker, right?) polishes her SIXTEEN Grammy awards. OH NO SHE DIDN'T.
Showing posts with label Beyoncé. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Beyoncé. Show all posts
Friday, 7 May 2010
Friday, 12 March 2010
High tariff
There's too much to say about this 'music video' (and we say that in the loosest terms seeing as it barely mentions the song and references nearly every film ever made), so we're just going to let it speak for itself. This is 'Telephone' by Lady GaGa and Beyoncé:
One thing, however; we're not sure those fag sunglasses are going to make it past the smoking ban.
One thing, however; we're not sure those fag sunglasses are going to make it past the smoking ban.
Tuesday, 16 February 2010
The BRITS; best bits, shit bits
So, in case you didn't already know (and if you're part of the very small group of international readers, why would you?) the BRIT awards are taking place in a giant shed in London tonight. We've always had a love/hate relationship with these awards and will of course be tuning in, even if it's just to see if the Susan Boyle cameo materialises (we're banking on her dropping from the ceiling caked in fake blood during Lady GaGa's set, but it will more than likely be a duet on Robbie's 'Angels').
To get us in the mood, let's look at some of the performances that have summed up the awards in one way or another.
THE GOOD
Great pop song, cheeky 'mash-up' with another great song and an entrance on a GIANT CD! Hello!
Usually the pairing of two 'superstars' results in things like The Ting Tings and Estelle attempting to muster some stage presence, but this was small scale, bruised and strangely hypnotizing.
These things are all about superstars and you don't get much bigger or better than Beyoncé. She can even make cars levitate!
THE BAD
Dog shit song, dog shit band.
Like being locked in a room with a playschool teacher and his slightly alternative reading assistant.
She emerges from a giant vagina...
THE UGLY
We weren't ready for the Second Coming Michael.
To get us in the mood, let's look at some of the performances that have summed up the awards in one way or another.
THE GOOD
Great pop song, cheeky 'mash-up' with another great song and an entrance on a GIANT CD! Hello!
Usually the pairing of two 'superstars' results in things like The Ting Tings and Estelle attempting to muster some stage presence, but this was small scale, bruised and strangely hypnotizing.
These things are all about superstars and you don't get much bigger or better than Beyoncé. She can even make cars levitate!
THE BAD
Dog shit song, dog shit band.
Like being locked in a room with a playschool teacher and his slightly alternative reading assistant.
She emerges from a giant vagina...
THE UGLY
We weren't ready for the Second Coming Michael.
Thursday, 11 February 2010
Passion(ate) Love Affair
Everyone and anyone is turning their hand at a Lady GaGa retwizzle (that sounds like a strange gymnastic sex act). Such is her dominance of the pop charts she's clearly decided to take over every club in the Western hemisphere. This is Passion Pit's remix of new single, 'Telephone', which is hardly earth shattering and for some reason they've got rid of GaGa's bits and just focused on Beyoncé's 'rap'. We're not complaining, we're merely observing.
Then we have disco oddballs Hercules & Love Affair who've turned the worldwide number 1 smash (TM), 'Bad Romance', into a dubby, early-'90s last song at the techno club kind of affair.
Not your thing? It could be worse. Listening to Lady GaGa whilst a flock seagulls peck at your testicles* is preferable to his excruciating version, however.
Serious rock face.
(*Replace with 'lady garden' if you are a female)
Then we have disco oddballs Hercules & Love Affair who've turned the worldwide number 1 smash (TM), 'Bad Romance', into a dubby, early-'90s last song at the techno club kind of affair.
Not your thing? It could be worse. Listening to Lady GaGa whilst a flock seagulls peck at your testicles* is preferable to his excruciating version, however.
Serious rock face.
(*Replace with 'lady garden' if you are a female)
Monday, 7 December 2009
Musick's Top 20 albums: 18
Lady GaGa – The Fame Monster
From prospective one-hit wonder to the world’s biggest pop star in the space of twelve months, Lady GaGa has straddled 2009 in a way that’s made all of us feel slightly uncomfortable. Whilst most people would be happy with a debut that features two of the biggest selling singles of the year, Lady GaGa wasn’t content until she’d recorded an extra eight songs, four of which could be singles, one of which features Beyoncé and all of which must make Madonna choke on her Kabbalah water. Good enough to be the follow-up to The Fame proper, The Fame Monster is somehow even better for showing complete disregard for anything as boring as following a normal release schedule.
Key track: ‘Alejandro’
From prospective one-hit wonder to the world’s biggest pop star in the space of twelve months, Lady GaGa has straddled 2009 in a way that’s made all of us feel slightly uncomfortable. Whilst most people would be happy with a debut that features two of the biggest selling singles of the year, Lady GaGa wasn’t content until she’d recorded an extra eight songs, four of which could be singles, one of which features Beyoncé and all of which must make Madonna choke on her Kabbalah water. Good enough to be the follow-up to The Fame proper, The Fame Monster is somehow even better for showing complete disregard for anything as boring as following a normal release schedule.
Key track: ‘Alejandro’
Monday, 23 November 2009
New Musick Monday
We all knew last week would be a success, in fact, we made sure of it. Echo sold over 160,000 copies in its first week, to debut at number 1, but that's about half of what her last album sold in the same period. Now, we're not suggesting that the wheels are falling off Leona's career per se, but what she lacks that a lot of other pop stars have is a definite personality. Songs like 'Happy' don't help matters. Speaking of personalities, Will Young's best of crashed in at, er, no. 9, which is hardly the work of a TV talent show alumnus, but we're pretty sure that's all he can hope for now. The Arctic Monkeys single seems to be missing from the top 40, which must be some kind of blip, right?
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Fuzzo by Brigadier Ambrose
OK, confession time, this band are friends of the blog. Not just, "oh yeah, we met them at a party, they seem like nice guys" kind of friends, but proper "we went to school together" type friends. We feel the need to make this clear from the outset given the fact that we love this album so much it's going to seem like nepotism either way. You'll assume we're friends even if we weren't when we say that Fuzzo is one of the best debuts of 2009. Influenced by surrealist British comedy just as much as they are by bands like Blur, Belle & Sebastian and Pavement, they've crafted an album that keeps one eye on the everyday and the other turned skywards. It also features this lyric; "Silences don't really mean a great deal anymore/ One minute for footballers and two minutes for war / Three for terrorist atrocities / Four for the death of Morrissey". Kind of says it all really.
BUY THESE MONOCHROME BEAUTIES
Rated R by Rihanna
The Fame Monster by Lady GaGa
Two of pop's biggest characters return with albums on the same day, one trying to build a new image after some well-publicised personal problems and the other cementing her status as 2009's best megastar. Rated R is a darker, denser affair than Rihanna's previous efforts, featuring far more aggressive, almost sadomasochistic imagery. Guns are licked, fired and drawn on skin (she has a tattoo of one on her hip), whilst love is variously depicted as dead, deadly or, er, Spanish ('Te Amo'). WARNING: This album features will.i.am. Lady GaGa's The Fame Monster on the other hand should be subtitled "what this? Oh I knocked this up in my lunch break", such is the run of form she seems to be on. Eight brand new songs, four potential singles, Beyoncé drops by for a brief cameo and somewhere Madonna dies a little inside.
DOWNLOAD THIS
Fall Be Kind EP by Animal Collective
This 5-track EP is a little bit darker, a little bit denser than their last album...oh, have we written that before today? Erm, it's their equivalent of Rihanna's Rated R album, only with longer songs and slightly more droning. Very good as ever, in other words.
DOWNLOAD THIS
Fuzzo by Brigadier Ambrose
OK, confession time, this band are friends of the blog. Not just, "oh yeah, we met them at a party, they seem like nice guys" kind of friends, but proper "we went to school together" type friends. We feel the need to make this clear from the outset given the fact that we love this album so much it's going to seem like nepotism either way. You'll assume we're friends even if we weren't when we say that Fuzzo is one of the best debuts of 2009. Influenced by surrealist British comedy just as much as they are by bands like Blur, Belle & Sebastian and Pavement, they've crafted an album that keeps one eye on the everyday and the other turned skywards. It also features this lyric; "Silences don't really mean a great deal anymore/ One minute for footballers and two minutes for war / Three for terrorist atrocities / Four for the death of Morrissey". Kind of says it all really.
BUY THESE MONOCHROME BEAUTIES
Rated R by Rihanna
The Fame Monster by Lady GaGa
Two of pop's biggest characters return with albums on the same day, one trying to build a new image after some well-publicised personal problems and the other cementing her status as 2009's best megastar. Rated R is a darker, denser affair than Rihanna's previous efforts, featuring far more aggressive, almost sadomasochistic imagery. Guns are licked, fired and drawn on skin (she has a tattoo of one on her hip), whilst love is variously depicted as dead, deadly or, er, Spanish ('Te Amo'). WARNING: This album features will.i.am. Lady GaGa's The Fame Monster on the other hand should be subtitled "what this? Oh I knocked this up in my lunch break", such is the run of form she seems to be on. Eight brand new songs, four potential singles, Beyoncé drops by for a brief cameo and somewhere Madonna dies a little inside.
DOWNLOAD THIS
Fall Be Kind EP by Animal Collective
This 5-track EP is a little bit darker, a little bit denser than their last album...oh, have we written that before today? Erm, it's their equivalent of Rihanna's Rated R album, only with longer songs and slightly more droning. Very good as ever, in other words.
Friday, 13 November 2009
Bad song/Great song interface, pt 1
This is a song by Beyoncé featuring Lady GaGa. It's a bit shit. This is it:
Reasons it's bad:
1). It wasn't a great song when it appeared on I Am...Sasha Fierce over a year ago and, unsurprisingly, it hasn't grown into a good song over night.
2). Lady GaGa doesn't really suit it and her vocals have obviously just been tacked onto it rather quickly (they even sound louder in the mix then the rest).
3). Videophones are a bit creepy aren't they? Not as good as telephones.
This is a song by Lady GaGa featuring Beyoncé. It's really great. This is it:
Reasons it's great:
1). It's was originally written for Britney who didn't want it and was then offered the guest spot on it but then decided she'd quite like it on her own forthcoming Greatest Hits package and GaGa said "No, I'm going to get Beyoncé on it instead".
2). It's got three choruses, Beyoncé's rap bit is brilliant and the whole thing thunders along at a rate of knots.
3). As we said above, telephones are great.
Reasons it's bad:
1). It wasn't a great song when it appeared on I Am...Sasha Fierce over a year ago and, unsurprisingly, it hasn't grown into a good song over night.
2). Lady GaGa doesn't really suit it and her vocals have obviously just been tacked onto it rather quickly (they even sound louder in the mix then the rest).
3). Videophones are a bit creepy aren't they? Not as good as telephones.
This is a song by Lady GaGa featuring Beyoncé. It's really great. This is it:
Reasons it's great:
1). It's was originally written for Britney who didn't want it and was then offered the guest spot on it but then decided she'd quite like it on her own forthcoming Greatest Hits package and GaGa said "No, I'm going to get Beyoncé on it instead".
2). It's got three choruses, Beyoncé's rap bit is brilliant and the whole thing thunders along at a rate of knots.
3). As we said above, telephones are great.
Monday, 9 November 2009
New Musick Monday
What an unmitigated disaster last week was. For a start, the Marina single is actually out on the 16 November (yeah, thanks nme.com!) and the much-touted and intermittently amazing Julian Casablancas album only went and missed the top 40 altogether. Just goes to show that oodles of 'proper' music press coverage (Musick included, naturellement) and a killer first single means diddly squat when your fanbase are only interested in the next album by the band you're meant to be fronting. The Nirvana reissue didn't shift many units either, but there was also a live album out at the same time and that managed to sell quite well, so we're claiming a small victory. Hurrah! This week's a bit of a struggle to be honest...
BUY THIS
Harvest Festival by Joe Goddard
Joe Goddard is the bearded one from Hot Chip. Not the singer, but the one who sometimes wears those retina-destroying woolly jumpers and worked on some of the early (and best) stuff by Little Boots. Harvest Festival is a diverting, kind of enjoyable slice of warm electronica that isn't exactly light years away from his day job, but does miss the pop sensibilities of their best bits. So, when we say 'buy this' we kind of mean 'buy this if you've got some vouchers left over or your Gran has found a fiver down the back of the sofa and given it to you thinking it was a tissue'.
DOWNLOAD THE CLUB BANGERS FROM THIS
In Love & War by Amerie
For those not on top of who's who in the great post-Beyoncé feisty female R&B challenge that took place about five years ago, Amerie is the woman that made this piece of perfection. She then went on to release some more songs but everyone just wanted to listen to '1 Thing' so nothing much ever happened career-wise. This is her fourth album and though it's not exactly trying new things, it does feature some pretty special moments, not least the first single, 'Heard 'Em All'. Again, you might not want to actually buy this. Oh, we don't know, just do what you want.
DOWNLOAD THIS
'Laura' by Girls
Girls are that band with scraggly hair and the backstory that everyone from Pitchfork to, well, other similarly minded music websites are calling 'the greatest thing of 2009'. This is the second single from their new album, Album, and it's a rather lovely concoction, all jangly guitar and little boy lost lyrics. The singer sounds like Elvis Costello, but looks like one of Hanson had they turned to crystal meth after 'Mmmbop'.
BUY THIS
Harvest Festival by Joe Goddard
Joe Goddard is the bearded one from Hot Chip. Not the singer, but the one who sometimes wears those retina-destroying woolly jumpers and worked on some of the early (and best) stuff by Little Boots. Harvest Festival is a diverting, kind of enjoyable slice of warm electronica that isn't exactly light years away from his day job, but does miss the pop sensibilities of their best bits. So, when we say 'buy this' we kind of mean 'buy this if you've got some vouchers left over or your Gran has found a fiver down the back of the sofa and given it to you thinking it was a tissue'.
DOWNLOAD THE CLUB BANGERS FROM THIS
In Love & War by Amerie
For those not on top of who's who in the great post-Beyoncé feisty female R&B challenge that took place about five years ago, Amerie is the woman that made this piece of perfection. She then went on to release some more songs but everyone just wanted to listen to '1 Thing' so nothing much ever happened career-wise. This is her fourth album and though it's not exactly trying new things, it does feature some pretty special moments, not least the first single, 'Heard 'Em All'. Again, you might not want to actually buy this. Oh, we don't know, just do what you want.
DOWNLOAD THIS
'Laura' by Girls
Girls are that band with scraggly hair and the backstory that everyone from Pitchfork to, well, other similarly minded music websites are calling 'the greatest thing of 2009'. This is the second single from their new album, Album, and it's a rather lovely concoction, all jangly guitar and little boy lost lyrics. The singer sounds like Elvis Costello, but looks like one of Hanson had they turned to crystal meth after 'Mmmbop'.
Friday, 6 November 2009
Let's Beyonest.
We've always had a slight issue with Beyoncé. Not because we don't like her, it's just that we want the best from her. If pop is a school - with Peter Andre cleaning the loos - then Beyoncé is the head girl, the one with all the ability, the one that everyone loves to hate and aims to be like. It's always been a slight disappointment to us that she's never previously been able to match the peak of 'Crazy In Love', her first solo single proper, and everything since then has been left lying limp in its wake. 'Deja Vu' was mildly diverting at first, 'Irreplaceable' is alright, 'Naughty Girl' has some appeal, but it wasn't until 'Single Ladies' and then 'Sweet Dreams' that we thought, "yes, Beyonce, this is you living up to your promise, well done. Now, where's your Geography homework?".
One thing that no-one can deny is that on stage Beyoncé is just about the most exciting thing to watch since, well, Michael Jackson. That is some accolade coming from us, believe it. You want truck loads of energy? Check. You want a sassiness that borders arrogance but keeps it in check? Er, check. You want a voice that sounds like honey, mixed with butter and a shot of vodka? What!? Check. Award shows just aren't the same without Beyoncé strolling in, shedding some clothes (she's not compromising her Christianity though) and putting on a show that makes Lady GaGa look like Stacey Solomon.
This is enough proof surely?
That look at the end that says, "yeah, you knows it. Can't no-one mess with the Beyoncé". We imagine she does refer to herself in the third person too: "Jay-Z, can you please get Beyoncé a biscuit? Yes, a wagon wheel would be fine for Beyoncé".
One thing that no-one can deny is that on stage Beyoncé is just about the most exciting thing to watch since, well, Michael Jackson. That is some accolade coming from us, believe it. You want truck loads of energy? Check. You want a sassiness that borders arrogance but keeps it in check? Er, check. You want a voice that sounds like honey, mixed with butter and a shot of vodka? What!? Check. Award shows just aren't the same without Beyoncé strolling in, shedding some clothes (she's not compromising her Christianity though) and putting on a show that makes Lady GaGa look like Stacey Solomon.
This is enough proof surely?
That look at the end that says, "yeah, you knows it. Can't no-one mess with the Beyoncé". We imagine she does refer to herself in the third person too: "Jay-Z, can you please get Beyoncé a biscuit? Yes, a wagon wheel would be fine for Beyoncé".
Thursday, 1 October 2009
The Maccapeas
We're well aware that this song was first aired way back in July (it's October already!?), but we only heard it recently and can't stop listening to it. Now, we all know that Jo Whiley is an unforgivable arse, but her 'Live Lounge' thing has produced some interesting cover versions. From little Will Young re-imaging 'Hey Ya' as a jazzy epic to Florence & The Machine tearing strips off of Beyoncé's 'Halo', there were moments when the artist really "made the songs their own". For The Maccabees that song was 'Boom Boom Pow' by the Black Eyed Peas...
Imagine if the Editors had tried this...awful, huh? The Maccabees don't take it seriously, they have a bit of a giggle, but at the same time the beat and the guitar sounds are amazing and Orlando Weeks gives it his best, "Will.i.am drop the beat now". The beat cover version since Robson & Jerome's 'Unchained Melody' and we really mean that.
Imagine if the Editors had tried this...awful, huh? The Maccabees don't take it seriously, they have a bit of a giggle, but at the same time the beat and the guitar sounds are amazing and Orlando Weeks gives it his best, "Will.i.am drop the beat now". The beat cover version since Robson & Jerome's 'Unchained Melody' and we really mean that.
Monday, 14 September 2009
Thursday, 10 September 2009
Disturbia
Apologies in advance for just throwing a video on here in lieu of any actual content, but this isn't just any old video. No, it's actually a new video with an old woman in it. It's by Fever Ray, it's called 'Seven' and there's something deeply disturbing about it all.
Interesting fact - this video was directed by Johan Renck, who also directed Beyoncé's 'Me, Myself & I' video. Imagine Beyoncé dancing around a barn with some demonic cows...
Interesting fact - this video was directed by Johan Renck, who also directed Beyoncé's 'Me, Myself & I' video. Imagine Beyoncé dancing around a barn with some demonic cows...
Wednesday, 19 August 2009
Crazy paving
We received a very strange email this morning claiming that Beyoncé was set to release an album of maudlin covers of her own songs. The ten song set is to be called B-yond Sadness and this is the first fruit of her labour:
Very touching.
It is of course Antony & The Johnsons (it says so on the video) with their take on the pop classic. Having played it live a lot of the last few years, this studio recording is available as the b-side to recent single Aeon.
Very touching.
It is of course Antony & The Johnsons (it says so on the video) with their take on the pop classic. Having played it live a lot of the last few years, this studio recording is available as the b-side to recent single Aeon.
Tuesday, 16 June 2009
Massive cock
Right, we know you're pretty much up to speed on the whole Beyoncé'thing' and her alter-ego business, but we thought we'd let you in on the next phase of her metamorphosis...get Kanye West to rap on a pretty weak track to bring it to the attention of radio. As a ploy it's not wholly original, but usually pretty successful.
'Ego' finds Kanye lazily mumbling about how girls love his "big ego" and pausing just before he finishes as if to say "actually I mean my big cock". If you haven't picked up on the subtleties of that then the next line is "so stroke my big ego"...HE MEANS COCK.
As for Beyoncé, well she slips into something less comfortable and grinds around like a mad woman, which is her being 'fierce' and 'empowered'.
'Ego' finds Kanye lazily mumbling about how girls love his "big ego" and pausing just before he finishes as if to say "actually I mean my big cock". If you haven't picked up on the subtleties of that then the next line is "so stroke my big ego"...HE MEANS COCK.
As for Beyoncé, well she slips into something less comfortable and grinds around like a mad woman, which is her being 'fierce' and 'empowered'.
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