XXXtina's sex tape

We find it a bit weird that no one has picked up on the fact that a Christina Aguilera sex tape has emerged. Featuring the diminutive wall-flower locked in a loving embrace with another woman and all sorts of other terribly risque things such as bondage and dancing in the rain, it's a wonder it hasn't been banned.

Here it is anyway. Be warned, it comes with a pretty awful soundtrack:

Somewhere Britney is pissing herself laughing.

Riddle me this

We love a good puzzle and we enjoy them more if they feature a current favourite and new(ish) band that sound promising.

Basically, this video appeared from nowhere for a new act called ceo:


ceo - prologue from Modular People on Vimeo.


At the same time, Musick favourites jj, posted a new song called 'ceo Birthday' and that can be heard (and downloaded) here

Now we hear that Secretly Canadian, jj's label, have announced that ceo is actually Eric Berglund from Tough Alliance and that ceo have an album coming out in June called White Magic. It's all so wonderfully intertextual. We can't wait for Christina to secretly introduce the next Britney album with the subtle, 'She's Not As Talented As Me (Or As Dirrty)'.

We're guessing it's got some high notes...

A vast amount of people have been working away in some darkened studio somewhere in America, desperately trying to make people forget about Christina Aguilera's awful Motown-era makeover a few years back. We're talking Sia, Ladytron, Le Tigre, Linda Perry and rumoured collaborations with Santigold and M.I.A. Somewhere along the line the ghost of Michael Jackson may or may not have breezed in to record BVs. So, after all that build-up, this is the first single from what is now called Bionic. 

Was it worth all that effort?

No really, was it? We're at work and can't hear it.

EDIT: We've listened to it and we can exclusively reveal that it's...OK.